The Power of Human Contact

The Power of Human Contact

“Gentle touch has been shown to facilitate physical and psychological functioning, particularly in terms of reducing stress, relieving pain, increasing the ability to cope, and general health ratings.”

I know you are stressed and exhausted and that often just makes the pain worse but I’m here today to stress the importance of TOUCH in your relationships. I understand that the pain and fatigue can make you want to completely cut the intimacy out of your life but as humans, we thrive on that connection. Person to person contact is mutually beneficial and has also been proven to help control anger.


According to the University of Miami School of Medicine, the health benefits of human contact are,
Decreased Pain- Children with rheumatoid arthritis who were given massages by their parents 15 minutes /day for one month reported lower stress levels, anxiety and pain.
Enhanced Immune Function- Studies have shown an increase in cancer fighting cells in women with breast cancer and HIV patients after massage. Anxiety, stress and depression also decreased.
Happy & Strong Babies- Premature infants given more touch and attention in the NCIU gained more weight.
Quicker & Less Painful Births- Women in labor who received a backrub for 15 minutes of each hour of labor reported less pain and used less pain medication. Labor was also typically shorter.
Enhanced Alertness and Performance- People completed math problems faster and made less mistakes after having a massage.

So if you think you’re in too much pain to be touched, think again. A little human contact may be exactly what you need.
I know there are days when even the lightest touch can be excruciatingly painful and send chills up your spine but you can’t isolate yourself forever. That’s not how you protect yourself.


  • Start with a professional massage.
  • Go somewhere reputable and make sure they know how to accommodate your chronic illness and touch sensitivities.
  • Communication is key! Make sure they are aware of any apprehension or anxiety you may be feeling as well as any extra sensitive areas. If you feel comfortable ask for some tips you could give your significant other.

Remember, touch is mutually beneficial and the intimacy of a romantic massage can do wonders for your relationship. If you feel like you’ve been drifting apart, simply holding hands can make you feel closer and spark a little romance. Start slow, it can be easy to feel overstimulated at first. Essential oils and lotions can reduce friction and even pain. Again, communication is key. Instead of shutting your partner out, try to help them understand. They can’t possibly fathom the pain that some sensations cause that’s why its critical they know what to avoid and what helps ease the pain. Please be mindful of allergies and irritants when selecting oils and lotions.

Have fun, be sexy!

Fall Adjustments

Fall Adjustments

I have been pushing myself too hard lately but I haven’t felt like I’ve had much choice. Obligations and conflicts have not left much leisurely time for hobbies and blogs. Fall has prompted a lot more changes than just the weather. As the leaves are falling, I sense a new season in my life beginning as well. I feel like the brisk air just revived me from a deep sleep. I’m nearing thirty and as someone who once showed so much promise, so much potential, I have nothing to show. I am a failure. I wasted so much time and now, I’m chronically ill and don’t have the energy. Not having the spoons doesn’t change what I need to accomplish. I realize now that I will need to retire one day. I already have a myriad of health issues that absorb most of my income and energy.
I am a lot busier since my truck broke down. It needs about twelve hundred dollars worth of work just to get it running properly. So, my poor Rose is just sitting out there, just about the time of year I could start enjoying the heated seats. If you are wondering about the name Rose, it’s from Doctor Who. Since my husband and I are sharing one vehicle, I am much busier. I can’t drive River, my husband’s car, another Who reference, because it’s a standard so I can’t get many errands done on my own. It’s so stressful relying on other people all the time. The anxiety it gives me wears me out almost as bad as driving does.
I started a new job, substitute teaching. So far, it’s been very spoonie friendly but it still takes a lot of spoons that I can’t seem to replenish. As a result I’ve been drinking a lot of Cokes and eating poorly. I’m cranky and can’t get enough sleep but so far, it’s been a very rewarding experience. Middle school is challenging but I had a blast at elementary. The children are all so sweet. I don’t think I’ve ever gotten so many hugs or tied so many shoes.
I just had a birthday and that has left me feeling unaccomplished. I should be done with college by now, I should have a more stable career and income so that I could have health insurance, a car note and a permanent home. Then, I wouldn’t have to worry about my truck breaking down all the time and I wouldn’t be exhausted from noisy apartment life. I’ve resolved to finish my degree so that I can achieve these things but if I want to achieve my dreams of becoming a librarian, I’ll be looking forward to three more years of school instead of just the one I need to finish my Bachelor’s degree.
I am also struggling with feeling like I’ve already passed my prime. I was first published in elementary school. My creativity knew no bounds. I wrote imaginative stories constantly because I couldn’t get them out of my head otherwise. High school teachers raved over the quality and originality of my work. I was the president of the creative writing club. I had passion. I had drive. Now I am just motivated by the fear of staying exactly as I am.
I never imagined my life like this, I’m sure no one with a chronic illness is exactly where they thought they’d be. I’m sure most people aren’t, actually. I take comfort in the fact that I have chosen to take the steps to try to better my life even if I am getting a late start. Perhaps it’s more of a restart but, that’s fine too.

Happy Fall, be sexy!

Spoonie Friendly Halloween Costumes

Spoonie Friendly Halloween Costumes

The key to a great spoonie friendly costume is simplicity. It should be quick and easy to pull together, not to mention, comfortable! But, that shouldn’t limit your options, you can still be anything you want, you might just have to get a bit creative. πŸ˜‰

Ghost- This has far got to be the the absolute easiest costume, even if you don’t have an ounce if creativity in your body. If you don’t have an old white sheet, stop by Goodwill. Walmart still sells some fabrics for a dollar a yard, so if Goodwill is a bust, go there. You can just cut out some eyes and go or you can draw a face and personalize it any way you want.

Hobo- Another super easy costume! Just push around a bunch of junk! With this one, you don’t even have to worry about putting on makeup or brushing your hair! As a matter of fact, the dirtier you look, the better. πŸ˜‰ Just dress in some old, maybe slightly over-sized clothes and maybe tie a bandana to a stick if you want to be one of those, fancy traveling hobos like in the old cartoons.

Black Cat- Were you hoping to show off your sexy side this Halloween? Well, a black cat might be the costume for you! If you’re not feeling creative or just don’t have the spoons, you can wear a mask instead of painting your face. The ears and tail are typically one of the cheapest items at the costume shop and you can pair them with a black leotard and some black tights, two things you likely already have in your closet.

Princess Belle- Before Belle became a princess, her outfit was very spoonie friendly! She wore a calf length, sleeveless blue dress, a white, long sleeved shirt and black shoes. A blue cotton dress over a puffy sleeved white shirt paired with some blackΒ ballerina flats and that’s all you need! Oh, and a copy of your favorite book and maybe a blue ribbon in your hair. This one is so basic and easy, you might not even have to buy anything for this costume!

Easy Olaf- Pair a white sweater with a white skirt or sweatpants and white shoes. Glue three black buttons to the front of the sweater and paint your nose orange. Black sunglasses and a beach ball are the perfect props because we all know how much Olaf loves summer! And warm hugs. πŸ˜‰

Well, these are just some ideas to get you started!

Here are some guidelines to ensure you’re as comfy as you are spooky-
πŸŽƒ Stick to cotton and other breathable materials.
πŸ‘» Make sure head-wear isn’t too heavy.
πŸŽƒ Footwear should be durable and supportive.
πŸ‘» Decorate with glitter in moderation.
πŸŽƒ Props should be minimal and easy to carry.
πŸ‘» Refrain from using hair products, make up and perfumes with strong smells that could give you a headache later.
πŸŽƒ If decorating your wheelchair, don’t leave anything hanging. You don’t want anything getting tangled in the wheels. Also, don’t make it too wide or awkward. You’ll want it to be easily maneuverable.
πŸ‘» Canes, oxygen trollies and other necessities can be decorated and incorporated into your costume as well.

Get spooky, be sexy!

Working Out or Just Working It?

Working Out or Just Working It?

I’m spotted most often sporting my gym clothes. Well, they have to get some use, don’t they?! They’re the most comfortable thing in my closet so I don’t deny myself that luxury when I’m going to the grocery store or running errands. But, what if you could be that comfortable at the office too? Would you wear your moisture wicking spandex to work if you could still manage to look professional? I know I would!
Not only could you be more comfortable all day but it would also save you time if you planned on hitting the gym on your lunch hour or after work.
Just imagine an entire workday without clasps and buttons digging into your skin, no itchy pant suits, no more sweaty meetings. Well, you’ll probably still have to endure the meetings but you will be cool and comfy!

Check out these links from, Popsugar and http://Self for more workout gear you can wear to work!

Stay comfy, be sexy!